What Are You Laughing At?

Have you ever noticed those people who make jokes at their spouse's expense? You know, the one that seems to bring up qualities or the little quirks that perhaps embarrass their marriage partner. Only to end with, "But honey, I was only joking."

One of the most important lessons that I think I've learned about being married is that there are certain things that I just don't discuss about my bride with anyone. At least not unless we've talked about it first. There have been times where we led some classes at church, and we decided on what we would talk about and what we wouldn't.

I remember one time, way back in the day when we would go to kid's camp for a few days with our church's children church. We had a couple of ladies in one of the classrooms checking everyone out for head lice, and Cheryl was sitting there getting her hair checked out, when I popped off about something about our private lives. Of course I did it just to be funny, but I completely didn't take into consideration her feelings nor did I think about it before I said what I said. I just thought this could be funny and I opened my mouth and totally embarrassed my bride.

On the ride to kid's camp I kept thinking about what I had said, and the look on her face. I felt horrible, and really wished I could have gone and taken all of that back. But, there is no time machine for making amends. Instead, I called her as we were driving (We both had driven our vehicles.) and asked her to forgive me. I truly was sorry for what I had done, and wanted to make it right before we got to camp.

I've remembered that for years now, and I'm pretty sure that I will never forget it. I now stop and think before speaking, and that image of the hurt on Cheryl's face has kept me from saying things many times. (Yay! I'm growing.) I'm sure that none of us really wants to do anything to hurt our spouse's feelings, yet it can happen if we don't watch what we're doing. Let's love our spouse and work really hard to keep from saying anything to hurt or embarrass them.